I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
