He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize