I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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