Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
