I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
