What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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