C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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