chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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