i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize