She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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