Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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