We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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