so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
