a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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