i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
