I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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