At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
