i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
