He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
