if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize