how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Mom said you looked used
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
