no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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