I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
