I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
