just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
