Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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