what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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