Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
