apparently the secret to your success is patron
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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