How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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