what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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