K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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