There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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