is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
