Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
