She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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