You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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