found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
