why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
