Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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