come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
oh god was she eating orange peels again
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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