Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Randomize
