awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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