everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
