Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
