At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
