we're chasing vodka with high fives
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
