fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
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my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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