based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize