do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
