maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
