wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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